Friday, December 11, 2009

Instant recall

Something happens when a bunch of Mormon women get together. And I don't mean salivating over werewolves.

Prices, baby. It's all about prices.

"Clementines at Frys are only 2.49 a bag!"
"No way. Bashas is 3.45."
"Don't forget milk is on sale at Costco. 1.89. Limit four."
"And I'm on my way to Jo-Ann's - garland is 1.99 for 9 feet!"

I have no idea if the prices I just quoted are anywhere near the truth; I have not a clue what things cost.

Anywhere.

This female ability to retain the prices of hundreds of items at a moment's recall astounds me. It's like some exclusive club that I should belong to, but instead am left pressing my face against the window, drooling.

I have my grocery list. I buy what's on my list. If there's a big sale sticker, I'm happy. But I couldn't tell you the price of the mint extract I just bought. Forty-five minutes ago.

On the other hand, my gray matter is very good at recalling completely useless information. Like all the lyrics to BNL's "One Week." Or who gave us that crystal bowl for our wedding. Or the name of the woman the Greek goddess Athena turned into a spider.

Do you think I could work it in my next price conversation?

"Strawberries for two bucks at Frys - today only."
I'm all about value.
"Do you like broccoli? On sale for $2.50 for three pounds."
I could put it in this beautiful bowl I got from the Kelicheivkis.
"I'm heading to the Farmer's Market - only 5 bucks for a bushel of peaches."
I'll go as soon as I kill this last arachnid - named for Arachne, the woman-turned-spider who thought she was better than Athena at weaving.

Nope. Probably not.

9 comments:

Fig said...

I'm a list shopper too - I know I could save TONS of money (don't even want to think about how much) if I paid attention to sales and stocked up on cheap things, rather than just buying what I want, when I want ...

But man, that's so much harder.

Kazzy said...

Hey, I watched The Price is Right Showcase the other day (just surfing, really, I promise), and I noticed at the end of the show that Drew Carey also asks the audience to have their pets spayed and neutered. Think that was part of the contract???

DeNae said...

I'm old enough to remember when "The Price is Right" was called "The NEW Price is Right", which I'm now certain just meant they'd redone the set or something, but at the time I thought, "Well, that's not very fair. You have to guess what the NEW price is?"

I, too, am useful-information challenged. However, when women are using that gift as fodder for the weekly "Good News Minute", I am secretly proud that I can't contribute anything to the dialogue.

And I knew the Arachne reference, too. So very, very sad.

(Although my personal gift is remembering archaic little scriptural references, as well as refs from the Apocrypha and well-frequented books like that. Want a great conversation stopper? Say, "Hey, that reminds me of the time the Macabbees..."

Harmony said...

Funny that we both alluded to "The Price is Right" in our blog posts today. Now that's true friendship.

Mommadj5 said...

I love the Homer Simpson brain - how's that for useless information?

Jocelyn Christensen said...

BTW - I've always wanted to be on the Price Is Right...but truth be told, I'd be the one relying on the audience's advice! :)

Kimberly Vanderhorst said...

Oooo! Me too!

I actually have a freakishly good memory but when other women discuss prices I'm lost. AND, I feel like I've been naughty, paying full price when if I'd only known...

This post made me giggle - you're fab. And yes, I'm saying that immediately after accusing you of being just like me. I'm modest like that.

InkMom said...

I'm with you, but I have a theory about why. I think I overvalue my own time. I mean, in order to know the prices on all of those grocery items, I have to either, A. have already been to ALL of them, or B. plan to go to ALL of them.

And I can tell you right now, that ain't never gonna happen. We would eat bargain bin ramen noodles for every meal before I would start shopping as 6 different stores just to save the money. And I'm happy to say that my mind is too full of music my photographically remembering brain stored 20 years ago, and, like you, a whole lot of Greek and Roman mythology, and algebra, and a whole lot of other non-useful stuff that I like to hold onto because it actually makes me feel like a thinking, intelligent human being.

The price of eggs? Not so much. I'm buying them regardless, right?

Danya said...

I'm in the "it's not how much you spent, it's how much you saved" camp. :) However, since having children, it is too painful to actually do too much shopping around (unless it is on-line), but I still enjoy a good bargain when I run across one.