Wednesday, January 6, 2010

Navel news

More-than-a-couple but less-than-many years ago, I was pregnant with our first child. I went maternity clothes shopping two months before I showed. We picked his name during the second trimester instead of at the hospital. And I actually thought it was pretty cool the first time I threw up. (Morning sickness! No way! I've heard of this! Awesome!)

Ah, naivete.

The one thing that What to Expect When You're Expecting TOLD me to expect that DID NOT happen was that whole belly button thing.


My Dr. Brother-in-law even had me convinced that it made a "popping" sound when it turned inside out. (Don't be too proud of yourself, Ben. I'm extremely gullible.)

But it never happened. Four times in a row, my belly button just stretches and stretches til it looks like ... a really stretched out belly button.

This makes for interesting entertainment, however. I like to run my finger over the smooth indentation, and play with the little star-shaped crease while I'm reading in bed.

(Some people twirl their hair. Others pick their nose. I play with my belly button. No apologies.)

So the other day I'm swirling around in there and my finger runs across this THING. It felt like a grain of rice, standing upright in a the centermost fold. (I'd say "centerfold," but that sounds wrong. This is a modest piece of rice.)

Except it wasn't rice. It was attached.

I poked and pulled and finally came to the conclusion that it must be some leftover shred of 28-year-old umbilical cord.

Cool.

A pair of tweezers and a short tug later, My Man and I examined that little piece of me.

"Hun," says he. "Let's put it in the freezer in case you get cancer or something."

But I opted instead to toss it in the garbage with the used Q-tips, snotty tissues, empty contact solution bottles and dirty paper towels.

Kind of anticlimactic, don't you think?

21 comments:

Kazzy said...

Interesting bit of biology there. LOL My third son had such an outie as a little guy that you could squish it and it made sounds. He is almost 14 now so I haven't seen his belly button for awhile.

Kristina P. said...

My friend is pregnant with her first and she posted on Facebook about her belly button turning like a thermometer.

I had no idea!

KC Mom said...

You've got me cracking up.

Steph @ Diapers and Divinity said...

You crack me up. And if you get cancer, your husband will so say, "I TOLD you..."

Julie said...

This is the weirdest post of yours that I have ever read.

I like it.

Julie said...

Oh, that is just gross! TMI!

not that it didn't happen to me after #5, but I'm not admitting to that and definitely NOT posting it. LOL)

MommyJ said...

belly buttons are just all kinds of weird, and even more so when they belly they adorn is pregnant...

wonder woman said...

Mine has popped every time. The first time I was was self-conscious about it and put a bandaid over it if my shirt was tight there. This time.......I don't even care.

I am without words that you pulled out a piece of your belly button. BIZ. ARRE.

Melanie J said...

I hate the belly button popping out. Mine's stretched flat right now but I dread when it's actually poking outward and making all my clothes fit extremely weird. Hate it, hate it, hate it. At least my ten-year-old finds it utterly hilarious.

Katrina said...

I am the same way. I have a really, really deep belly button so when I'm pregnant it just stretches and starts to turn somewhat inside out, but never pops. It never flattens. I always still have an inny, even at the end.

Rachel Sue said...

My belly button has never once popped.

And, gross!

Kimberly said...

Mine has never popped and I would totally play with it but I'm too ticklish.

You're hilarious, by the way. Thanks for the giggles.

And thanks for the yummy chocolates and burt's bees and nail stuff! My parents FINALLY got the package to me and it made my holiday extra lovely - you're the sweetest of the sweet!

rad6 said...

so does this mean that there are people out there who have lived a long time who have things STUCK in their belly buttons???? EWWWWWW... that is just wrong.
Glad you got it out!
Did it smell funny?
Haha!
Love that you posted this... makes you as weird as the rest of us!

Nikki said...

So COOL. I knew I liked you for some reason. I'm a belly button twiddler when I'm pregnant. I totally have an innie that never pops out. I thought for sure it would happen with the twins pregnancy. It did get extremely flat though. And I regret never taking a bare picture of my belly.

Harmony said...

Oh, how I love your life's moments...

DeNae said...

Are you sure it wasn't just leftover popcorn from the last time you went to the movies? In which case, I'm pretty sure it wasn't worth saving in the freezer.

trublubyu said...

hehehe!

The Prices said...

you plucked it?!

Just SO said...

Wow you are brave. What if in plucking that you had undone your belly button? That would have been awful!

My niece is pregnant with her first and her belly button has turned into a belly dash. It's this little line that just goes horizontally across where her button used to be.

My belly button never popped out either.

Elizabeth said...

Just for the record (although why I feel like leaving record of this I could not tell you) I have to re-clean out my bellybutton every time I'm pregnant (because that's the only time I can "get to the bottom of it.") The first time was the worst, of course, but I found a skin tag in there and really hurt myself trying to remove it with the other stuff. Yeowch. I recognize it now. :P

Stepper the Mighty said...

I am also relieved that the plucking did not result in any balloon-like deflating or unraveling of any kind.

My button simply disappears when pregnant. Isn't that weird? It just stretches until it's gone.

And I am left with no proof that I'm human. This makes me nervous.