Tuesday, May 11, 2010

On sparkly butts and flowers

Arizona totally has a THANG goin' on. Everyone I see is:

A) blonde
2) skinny
T) wearing rhinestone jeans and flowered headbands.

I noticed this trend the very first week we moved here. I turned to My Man with wide eyes and whispered, "everyone's butts are sparkling. Don't look." I haven't worn rhinestones since ... okay, I've never worn rhinestones. And I vowed then and there to never do so. Not to mention the fact that I think I would just feel silly with an overlarge flower in my hair. I'm still getting used to wearing earrings. Plus then I would feel like I have to DO something to my hair besides my usual blow-dried straight, ponytailed, or barrette-ed dos.

Somehow I got this vindictive pleasure in being uncool. Because if you CHOOSE to not follow a trend, you're setting a trend of your very own. You are announcing to the world that you are actually cooler than the cool people, because, in fact, you do not care. It's like the anti-Twilight-clubbers who've never read the book. Or people who don't wear makeup. Or watch TV. Or eat healthy. I sense a sort of righteous pride in them for not stooping to something like mass public appeal.

So the other day I found solace with another non-reflective backside. I met a friend at the park and we conformed over our non-conformity. We postulated about whether the rhinestones wear down car seats, or give an extra boost to the laundry machine. We laughed about bees hovering over headbands or getting makeup on a petal.

We were mean.

I got home and shared the source of our giggles with My Man, expecting laughter as well. And I got

"I always thought those headbands were pretty."

I am now searching Etsy. I'm thinking this one?